Rants and Raves Mashup - Great Falls, Montana

Thank you Great Falls women, and Yoga pants. Ive been seeing alot of ladies wearing yoga pants. Now I'm an ass man, and the view i've been getting is phenomenal. Ass cheeks and legs, so clearly defined. I am enjoying it. Thank you Great Falls ladies for being fit and sexy. Fat women need not wear them, however. The Heisler family that owns the Pit Stop are good people.......... They good at serving dookie........ They make sure customer get hot, steamy pile of dookie....... They give you big pile of dookie when ya order spaghetti red (a.k.a dookie-ghetti red)............ Pit Stop make sure you get their biggest, freshest pile o' dookie every order............ Heisler family and crew are pros at serving fresh, warm, stinky pile o' dookie........... They pinch one off..........Just for you............ If you like to eat dookie, eat at Pit Stop.......... Baby i'm so happy u didn't drown in Idaho than I would have never met u and I love u so much and i'm so happy with u:) u r an amazing dad step dad and husband. I sit here broken trying to pick the pieces back up. Had a piece of me ripped apart, moved back home to Montana. Now here I am in a small town trying to start all over again. Boy oh boy how interesting or boring is my life gonna be now. I can't seem to find a decent gal in this town. All of the women around here have four kids from four different fathers.The women here in MT are BOTTOM OF THE BARREL! They are overweight and so hedious looking. I can't believe you rednecks fight over 300lb hags with 4 kids...hahahahaha. You women around here should take notes from your counterparts "north of the border." Canadian women are more educated, friendlier, healther, and better looking than 99% of the women in MT.

RIP Karen Black

The wacky-cool actress and singer Karen Black died today. Here are some pieces of Ms. Black you should check out. 

A shark on the subway

Want to know what's happening in America? Well here you go. A shark was found on the subway in NYC. It didn't ask to be there. It didn't leap from the Pacific into the train car to spend its afterlife on sticky black floors. But there it was, sitting there with a cigarette in its mouth and a metrocard tucked under its slippery fins.  

There are stories as to how this creature ended up here. Pranksters pranking. Teenagers teening. Hipsters hipstering. Whatnot. But here's what really happened: 

It was 2am. The ocean was warmer than usual. Too warm for a baby shark with a heart murmur. This particular heart murmur would morph into a full blown attack and cause the baby shark, now swimming at a comfortable distance from its mother, to perish instantaneously. The next morning, the baby shark would wash up onto Rockaway Beach only to be discovered by an elderly lady named Sue who, feeling lonesome and rather randy, would pick up the shark, finger its fins and stuff it inside her bosom for safekeeping. After an hour of absorbing the stench and rubbery skin of the baby shark, Sue would decide it would be best to let her finned friend go. But where?, she would think, looking around her favorite Italian bakery for a large potted plant to toss the baby shark into. Now, a half an hour late for work, sue would carry the shark onto the subway. When her stop arrived, she would take a cigarette from her bag, pop it inside the baby shark's mouth and stuff her unlimited metrocard under its somewhat bloated body. By doing this she would feel less guilty about leaving it all alone. At least it would have a little nicotine and plenty of gas to get around.

Later on, mainly out of pity for the sad, dead shark, someone would give it a chilled beer.