Frozen Shrimp

I am with a few people from high school and other people from Facebook, people I don't know well, but admire in subtle ways. We are all headed to a white ship in the mountains, journeying to a place we haven't been before. My friend and her lover hump in the one bed. I sleep in the bathtub and make phone calls to others letting them know how far away we are from our destination. Beckett is on my mind. She is with me, and not with me. I look for her. I call up my friend who works as a peace advocate and ask him what he'd like to eat for dinner. I tell him to take the shrimp out of the freezer. 

Bobbles

I'm dating the new boyfriend from Girls. He's very wrapped up in me and listens to everything I say, wide eyed. We stroll around, hand in hand. We fall in love. Later we are in an auditorium with several kids from high school. They begin telling my boyfriend about all the things I used to do as a kid, how goofy I was and how I used to laugh so hard I'd pee my pants. I hear him laughing and saying bad things about me too. I walk into the auditorium crying. He doesn't move. I tell him I'll bring him his stuff from my place, I'll mail it, he nods his head. Later I'm in Brooklyn under the J train. He approaches me and tries to hold my hand. He says he's sorry and I don't want to forgive him, but I do in a way. We hang out with a trio of British Comedians who flap and chortle in the breeze like paper dolls.  

There are a group of close friends hanging out. They are blends of people that I know now, celebrities and old friends. We are all parents and are hanging out without the kids for the night. Someone suggests that we wear pajamas to an event. They can be dirty or old. So we do. A guy I'm talking to looks like a younger George Bush. He's smarmy and wearing a tux with a red cape. At the event, which seems like a high school reunion, I see a guy I made out with when I was 13. He's buff and balding. He's recently had a child, his first. I congratulate him and he says. It's amazing. I'm 36 and I waited this long to have sex. I was a virgin until we made the baby. And I love it. It's amazing. I want it all the time now. 

A Filthy Bathroom and The After Party

I'm on a bus filled with a blend of characters and strangers from high school. My arm is linked to a boy I have a secret crush on and we do our best to keep our affections to ourselves. I get up to go to the bathroom and several girls follow me. They are beautiful and talk about all that's involved in the process of staying beautiful. I stand away from them and try my best to keep to myself. The bathroom is filthy, not unlike some of the bathrooms at bus stops in India. Molded walls, trash, shit on the floor. I notice I'm wearing a formal, fluffy gown and pull it way above my head to keep shit off of it. Later I am at a party. It's in a combination of an airplane hanger and Enids, a restaurant I used to frequent in Williamsburg. I am hosting this party, running around trying to get everything prepared. I'm anxious about things being perfect and excited once people start trickling in. One of the first guests is a kid from high school, Brian, and his new wife. he hasn't changed at all and I attempt to ask him about the last 20 years in just a few minutes. The place is filling up and I rush to get drinks and food to people. A woman in a jumpsuit walks in. She says she's my stepmother and that she's writing a book about her life called "step." I tell her that's a great idea, then pour her a drink.