For the last several days, I have been jaunting along the jagged boardwalk of Seaside Heights, New Jersey, staring at people in neon bathing wear, sucking down sugar piles and fried blobs, and playing rounds of ski-ball while giant black flies suck my ankles dry. Here are some noteworthy moments over the last few days: A man with lady boobs shrieking in an upside down position
Two Russian girls blowing bubblegum, talking on cell phones, applying lipstick and securing roller coaster riders into their seats.
"Italians do it better" temporary tattoo possibilities
Merry go rounds
Genuine photo booths
Fiendish baseball watching
Several matching mother and daughter swimsuits
One apathetic young woman nodding off in her kiddy ride driver seat
Florescent t-shirts that read "Jersey Shore 2009 Party 4-Ever"
Three empty miniature golf courses
A sea of suntanned people and rainbow beach objects