It's been a whole year since I married the girl of my dreams... myself, in the city of Danang, Vietnam with the help of three lovely ladies: Amanda, Stella and Karen. If you haven't seen my wedding album, feel free to check it out HERE. It's been a fine year indeed. I've learned quite a bit from my wife and feel as if our matrimony is only just beginning. To further deepen the love between myself and myself, I have decided to renew my vows and also add a few more just for the hell of it:

I will honor your mind and feed it the right amount of literature, dirt, spinach, pornography, and music.

I will challenge you each day, and root you on with the help of backup singers and miniature cheerleaders.

I will care for your body in sickness and in health, nourishing each follicle of hair and inner and outer cell.

I will sing to you when you are feeling glum.

I will give you the space you need to expand and make.

I will look for you in crowded areas instead of sneaking away.

I will not put up with your shit, and will spank any cantankerous behavior from your flatulent rump.

I will forgive you when you have betrayed me.

I will not let you falter unless you want to.

I will trust each of your actions and address patterns when they arise.

I will make you pay attention and keep your lungs afloat with breath.

I will follow you wherever you choose to go (even to N'Djamena).

I will massage your knees, elbows and chin each day.

I will push you to take risks - even if they may be dangerous

I will encourage you to do things for others - just because

I will provide you with trees for washing

I will try, each day, to be a better mammal for you and the rest of the big bad world